The past three weeks, Sarah Jenks and Nisha Moodley have given you practical and useful tips to help you beat the mental craziness and negotiation around food so that you can both end your frustration and find peace with food and your body.
First, they taught us the importance of putting ourselves first and why it’s the best tool for stopping our obsession with food. Then we discovered why it’s so important to just eat the darn donut already! (And boy were we glad to hear that!). And last week we learned about an important tool for releasing our dependence on food.
Finally, this week, they’re hear again to show us how to create a structure for support so we can stay on track, no matter how badly your mother-in-law may make you feel about eating dessert or how stressful the holidays may be.
How To Stay On Track With The Support Of Other Women
For any of you who have ever failed at ‘staying good’ and being on track with your food, we come with good news: it’s not your fault. When it comes to food (and most of life) one of the biggest reasons that women often feel lost at sea without a paddle is that we feel like we have to go it alone.
Because we no longer live in communities with other women the way we used to, many of us feel like our lives revolve around taking care of our jobs, our classes, our families and our partners, with no real time with our women friends.
Most of us feel that our food ‘issues’ are OUR problem that we need to get through on our own – that we created this mess and we are the ones that need to clean it up. And, in a way, we’re right. When healing our relationship with food and our body, the turning point will come when we realize that, if we are going to get through this, we have to make a loving commitment to ourselves.
But ultimately, the make-it-or-break-it point arrives both when we start to create some action around it and when we enlist others in our mission. Creating a team of supporters, butt-kickers and cheerleaders to help us stay connected to our beauty and our worth (even when we can’t see it) will be the buoy that saves us at sea. Having a coach and our best girlfriends to back us up will help us avoid the feelings of isolation that the mental negotiation with food can create. As we learn to navigate new waters, these loving supporters will help us float past comments like “oh you’re on a diet?” when we politely decline ‘seconds’ because we already feel satisfied. This sisterhood will leave us feeling calm, confident, clear and on track with our mission.
Here’s a quick tip for creating a structure for sisterly support:
1. Call up some women in your life and invite them to meet up with you for some sister-time. Maybe it’s brunch, a potluck or a long afternoon walk.
2. When you get together, center the conversation around 3 things: BRAGS (What’s going well? What amazing things are you up to or creating?), GRIPES (Just air them out, sister! Whatever is frustrating, upsetting or not working so well.) and GOALS (This is where you can share about your quest to end your frustration with food and your body. Make sure that each of you walks away with a structure for support around your goals.).
This exercise will create the concrete feeling that we are NOT alone. And this feeling is crucial to getting our paddles back, and guiding ourselves safely to shore.
Help give confidence to others (and yourself)! See how here!