First Date Rules: The 10 Commandments of The 1st Date

By Alexis Wolfer

Relationships may be hard, but dating is brutal. Who would have thought that finding an adequate companion to share a meal with could be so challenging. But, alas, it can be. So, when you do find someone worth a few hours of your time, the last thing you want to do is blow it. Luckily, the women behind Project Soulmate, a private boutique matchmaking service catering to successful, educated singles (aka all you ladies out there), have us covered with the unspoken rules of dating.

Dating 101: The 10 Commandments Of The 1st Date


Natural Is Beautiful. Over-painted and over-perfumed is over the top (and not in a good way)! Go easy on the makeup and let your true beauty shine. Not only is it important to show your date what you actually look like (false advertising is never a good thing!) but men actually prefer women who don’t look made-up.


Keep ‘Em Guessing. The fantasy of your naked body will turn your date on considerably more than seeing all the goods right away will. Heck, if you slut it out on your first date with him he’s bound to think you’re slutting it up with lots of other dates too. Let your date’s imagination run wild. We’re not saying to wear a man-repeller inspired outfit, but sexy not slutty is the way to go. (On the same note, sleeping with a guy on a first date often guarantees there won’t be a date #2.)

Why you should wear sexy undies, even if he won’t be seeing them!

“Fashionably Late” Doesn’t Apply. We’re inclined to say that this is one instance in which the saying “better late then never” doesn’t apply – but, let’s be honest, standing your date up isn’t a great game plan either! That being said, being late is neither fashionable nor mysterious. It’s annoying and disrespectful. We know, things happen, but really do your best to be punctual. And, if you are running late due to circumstances beyond your control, call to let your date know.

Make A 1st Impression. When you first meet your date, give a kiss on the cheek and lean in. It’s a powerful, feminine and very alluring way to start the evening.

Listen As Much As You Talk. There is nothing more important than showing your date that you’re interested in what he/she is saying. While it’s important to share what makes you a better catch than the other 3 women your date likely went out with last week, don’t forget to ask questions, listen carefully and show interest. And that iPhone you usually have crazy-glued to your hand, turn it off and put it away (no date wants to compete with a chatty BFF… yet…).

Keep The Past In The Past. No one wants to hear about other dudes on a date, especially your past relationships. Not only will your date instantly start playing the comparison game (and, trust us, there is no winner in this not-at-all-fun game), but also you’ll seem still wrapped up in the past (which is where your exes should stay).

Need help getting over an ex? Read this!

Make Eye Contact. Look directly into your date’s eyes when you’re talking. It makes the statement that you are confident, sexy and self-assured. And when your date says something funny, don’t be afraid to make physical contact as well. A slight touch of his wrist will make him feel confident as well.

Drink Moderately. Tipsy is fine. Wasted, not so much. You want to maintain complete control and put your best self forward so keep drinks to a minimum.

Live In The Moment. Nothing scares a date off faster than a gal who’s already named her unborn children. A close second on the scare-o-meter is a first date who’s already planning out the future… together. Bottom line: live in the moment.

Be Yourself! At the end of the day (or, date, if you will), you want to be loved for being you. So, bring your best self and let your inner beauty shine.

Confidence boosting tips for before the big date!