Confessions of a Personal Development Junkie

By Jill Rudnitzky

I came into 2012 on a mission to KICK ITS ASS. It’s not that 2011 was bad, but in 2012 I wanted to take it to the next level.

I went to lectures, attended workshops, dove into a Tony Robbins Unleash The Power Within retreat, signed up for tutorials, checked out a seminar on how to be a life coach (wasn’t for me!) and spent more time in the self-help section of Barnes and Noble than I care to admit.

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I became a personal development junkie.

Here’s the deal: I wanted to stop running on auto-pilot (from gym, to work, to dinner, to bed, and repeat). I wanted an extraordinary life. I wanted to be overflowing with joy and fulfillment.

Sound familiar?

So, what did I learn during the last 8 months of self-help overdosing? (Ya know, so you don’t have to start budgeting for a disguise you can rock every time you head to the self-help section of your local bookstore?)

I learned that the goal is to live life in alignment… and how to do it.

But let me backtrack… throughout all of these lectures, seminars, workshops, books and more, I kept on hearing about this idea of living life in alignment – and (perhaps like you) every time thought, “hey, that sounds good. Give me one of those!” Quickly followed by, “mmm, okay, but what is it exactly? And how do I get it?”

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The beautiful, wise and immensely soul-tickling, Suparna Bhasin, Founder and Creator of She Creates Change, says, “Living in alignment means that one’s beliefs, actions and feelings are all allied or in a row. When one accomplishes this, it means a life characterized by integrity and as a result, positive emotions, feelings and sensations.”

Believe that alcohol is inhibiting your path to realizing your dreams but you’re still drinking, you likely feel, well, crappy. And not just because you had too many tequila shots last night. But rather because your beliefs and actions are misaligned.

For me, I have a belief that in order to truly be happy and fulfilled, I need to be completely financially independent. Nevertheless, I continue to invoke the assistance of my extremely supportive and generous parents (thanks mom & dad!). As a result, I feel anxious. Very. Anxious.

The solution: You either change your belief system or your action in order to change your feelings.

Believe that drinking is destroying your dreams? Change your action (stop drinking) and you’ll be one step closer to an extraordinary life.

Believe happiness and fulfillment only come from financial independence (like me!)? You may want to say, “Get off daddy’s dime, Princess.” That’s one option. (Although it isn’t quite that easy. There’s rent, bills, and that gym membership I mentioned above…okay, okay, the last one of course could be eliminated.) Or you can change the belief system to align with your action and your feelings will change. So, now I’m trying, “I am truly blessed to have parents who are willing to assist me while I figure out my dreams.” With this slightly revised belief system, I am able to take a breath, accept the blessings in my life and feel at ease that my actions are entirely in-step with my goal of having an extraordinary and ahhh-mazing life. (Don’t get me wrong, this is not a means of justifying the financial aid forever – this is simply a way to focus on the blessings I’ve been given, instead of harping on the lack in my life as I navigate the sometimes confounding waters of my mid-20’s. The goal of course remains the same: financial independence and freedom.)

Figure out your beliefs, get clear on your actions and put them in alignment for a life of fulfillment and happiness, regardless of where you are right now, or where you’re heading. Remember: keep aligning and refining.

You can thank me later for saving you time and money in the self-help tab of

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