By Isabel Foxen Duke

I’m about to drop the only name you ever need to know: IGGY AZALEA. Her first album drops today (after the release of several totally viral youtube videos and some crazy-yet-well-deserved internet hype).

If you haven’t done so already, youtube her immediately. She is the sexiest woman on the planet, and inspires me to be such for the following reasons:

1. She is so in her body, it’s crazy. She clearly feels every physical sensation known to man. I want that.

2. She owns her sexuality like, whoa, and LOVES her body — there is no position she does not want to fuck from.

3. Her self-care regimen includes manicures inspired by Fran Drescher (a.k.a The Nanny) and now I know that nail-art cultism is a thing.

4. She is so NOT intimidated by breaking into a business where she is a total minority; her race, gender and citizenship are constantly under scrutiny, and she handles herself like a beast — ain’t no one gonna take her down. (Azalea Banks called her an affront to black culture…and that was P.R. mistake if ever I saw one).

5. She has officially reclaimed the word “Pussy,” and I think it’s time we all did.

6. Her first “real” music video production “Murda Bizness,” mocks children’s beauty pageants and I’m okay with that.

7. Her vagina is animated.

8. She was born in 1990 (wait, what?!)

So, yea, I want to be a badass female rapper from Australia, because they clearly have the most fun. Make some room, Nicki Minaj.

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